Basic Fucking Kindness

adhd, neurodivergency, self compassion "Executive dysfunction life hack Instead of telling yourself, "i should get up," or "i should do this," Ask yourself, "When will i get up?" or "When will i be ready to do this?" Instead of trying to order yourself to feel the signal to do something, which your brain is manifestly bad at, listen to yourself with compassionate curiosity and be ready to receive the signal to move when it comes. Things i did not actually realize was an option Another thing that has been helpful for me personally has been, when my brain says, ‘I don't want to do that thing right now," i ask it, "Okay. Why not right now, specifically?" Sometimes there's a reason, and that's cool, but sometimes my brain is like "... because?" And i am able to tell my brain it's full of nonsense and we do the thing."

trauma, self compassion "Forgive yourself for not knowing better at the time. Forgive yourself for giving away your power. Forgive yourself for past behaviors. Forgive yourself for the survival patterns and traits you picked up while enduring trauma. Forgive yourself for being who you needed to be."

long ago, when humans still lived in caves, someone had to stay up all night to watch out for bears etc part of the evolution of the humans made it so a part of the group would be awake at night and sleep at day that part of human history wasnt "that" long ago. there hasnt been time to make brains de-evolve that bit even nowadays, a part of the human poblation has their brains wired to be awake at night no matter what if you have a hard time staying awake at day and/or sleeping at night, dont beat yourself up too much about it. its unfair if you blame yourself for stuff that isnt your fault

parenting, trauma "there is a tiktok i saw of a woman who was 80 who said when she was 13/14 and was first trying out makeup and her mom saw her put on blush, her mom said she looked like a clown and now 60+ some years later, to this day, she hears her mom's voice say that to her when she puts on blush and she ended the tiktok with how words parents say to us haunt us forever and i have been thinking about that a lot cause so many of the negative things i hear in my head forever are my mom's voice of things she said if you're a parent or plan on becoming one, don't become your child's negative voice for their entire lives"

meds, adhd, depression "life hack got something you need to do at a certain time every day (e.g., take meds)? start giving your cat a treat right before you do it. You may have trouble remembering, but your cat absolutely will not."

emotions, trauma, self compassion "emotional flashbacks often dont have a visual component. pay attention to suddenly feeling small, powerless, helpless-- they're signs you might've been triggered and yanked into an emotional flashback Breathe; blink; check in with your senses; engage your self talk script."

drugs, trauma "psychedelics are not therapy" [subjetive take. dont take sourceless posts on the internet as medical advice carelessly]

socialization, abuse, self compassion "please dont beat yourself up for not picking up on red flags sooner. you did your best at the time and ultimately its not your fault someone was treating you badly Not only that, but it’s not uncommon for abusers to hide or make excuses for things that turn out to be red flags when you look back. And even when they don't, you're not always going to see them in the moment, sometimes you don't realize something is bad until after time has passed and you've processed it."

socialization, lgbt " If someone is coming out to you/telling you about their sexuality, match their energy. If they’re not making it a big deal, you shouldn't either. If they're really nervous or emotional, respond with compassion. If they're excited, be excited with them. I've seen a lot of things that seem to imply that it's always best to be really super amped about someone coming out, but that kind of energy can be embarrassing or uncomfortable if the person doesn't feel the same way. On the flip side, if you respond with indifference, you might think you're being a good friend by not caring whether they're gay or straight or whatevs, but that can be extremely invalidating if this is a monumental or exciting moment for the person. Read the room, match the energy."

mental health, self compassion, socialization "You hate yourself so loudly. You hate yourself at the top of your lungs. Your loathing for yourself permeates your speech. "Sorry I’m just rambling." "Don’t worry about it." "Just ignore me." "Sorry if I’'m annoying you." "Sorry i don’t make sense." "Sorry about that." Sorry, sorry, sorry. You act as if you have to beat everyone else to the punch. As if the punching bag is you. If you hate yourself first, if you hate yourself loudest, then nobody will hurt you. You clapped your hands over your ears and shut your eyes and balled yourself up so that you’d never have to experience people’s loathing for you. And it meant you never heard their love. You drowned it out. You screamed your hatred over it. And you never got to hear it."

parentship, abuse "Should I Spank My Child? A Comprehensive Flowchart Are they old enough to understand reason? yes > then use reason no > Then they're not old enough to understand the reason you're striking them. Stop hitting your child, asshole."

abuse, mental health, socialization "someone who's been mentally abused will:"